Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Can't We Just Be Real

Well friends, it has been a long time since I have blogged.  I have had a lot on my plate.  Last month I had excess skin removed from my stomach and it is healing quite nicely and I am back to cycling, or should I say back to working on my Carrie Underwood legs and my Michelle Obama arms (a girl can dream can't she).

December 14 was Zechariah's birthday, my little man would have been 2.  With each birthday or milestone that is missed I think about how life has not been what I expected.  For just a brief moment I feel sorry for myself, but then I am reminded there is always someone who has it worse than I do.  However, it leads me to think about how fake we are as a society.  We go through life putting on heirs of perfection.  Striving to convince people that we are the perfect mom's, wife's, sisters and daughters.  However, there are people like my family just trying to find a new sense of joy again and barley holding it together after losing a child.  Do people know that we have been struggling?   Probably not too many.  Has society made it easy to share our joys, pains, and struggles?  Nope sure hasn't been easy.

So in attempt at being a person who is real and transparent I will share a little bit about myself, maybe it will spur others to be more open and honest.  My name is Tabatha, I am a mother, wife, sister and daughter.  I am a neat freak which really means I am a control freak.  I am not one of those you see at church; meaning I am not a perfect stay home wife and mother who can turn everything into a perfect life lesson with a Bible story and all.  Don't get me wrong we talk about the Lord frequently but we also live a real life.  I cook healthy but I don't necessarily cook gourmet.  I love when Faith goes to preschool and I get 3 hours to myself.  I am not one of those mom's that can home school, cook perfect meals each day, and have my husband perfectly happy at all times.  I don't craft, crafting is not really my thing, all though  I do love other people's crafts.  I am also a recovering food addict, that may make some people laugh but you don't get to 247 pounds by controlling what you put in your mouth.  I have spent the last year and few months working hard at losing the weight and facing my stuff instead of stuffing my face.  Life has been hard the last few years, physically, emotionally, health wise, and it has taken a toll on my marriage.  Derek and I are trying to pick up the pieces of our life and figure out how to function after losing our son, and how to deal with loss in our own way, since we both have grieved differently.  Life is messy and has been hard but one thing remains God is still good through it all.  If God is going to be good to us in the good times then He is still good in the bad times.  Maybe if each of us spoke the truth about our live's more often we wouldn't be so lonely, we could rise up and spur one another on, we could truly be as the Bible says, iron sharpening iron.

So friends be honest today, with yourself, your friends, and your family.  It doesn't mean telling the world all your business, it just means take a chance, share your life.